I believe I have actually said enough. I wish you would think the same. You have actually never shut up asking me about my day at work as I aim to view the sport on tv. On and on you have gone asking concern after concern. It makes me question why you are so bloody interested. Fishing for something are you? Aiming to capture me out? You won\’t do that. I am cleverer than you. Much cleverer. Exactly what I do at work is nothing to do with you and you won\’t find out about my strategies there up until such time as I decide that you should know. And it isn\’t really time, so I wish you would simply be peaceful and let me view this video game. You keep going, discussing my television viewing which informs me that you concern my watching experience as unimportant which tells me you obviously believe I am not important and you really should understand by now that I are necessary. I hate you doing this. I can feel the burning from your self-centered and treacherous action and it is paining me, however I understand exactly what to do. I understand how to stop this pain and think me I am going to do it and do it now.You never ever know when to shut up do you? I expect you think you are being plessant asking me how my day has been, however you don\’t care, you simply do it for the sake of appearances, to make you look great, the caring and interested partner. I understand your video game. I have you exercised, you are a fraud. Yap, yap, yap, like some annoying pup around my ankles, on and on you go. Just shut up will you? I can not focus with your wasp like ringing around me.
\”How is the new hire getting on?\”
\”How is the project establishing?\”
\”Where did you opt for that organisation lunch? Was it great? Exactly what did you have to eat? Who was it with?\”
Just shut up. No, you are still chattering away. I do not believe you are even waiting on a response are you? Simply asking concerns to appear like you are involving me in the conversation when all you are doing is participating in another of your pointless and egotistical monologues. Do you understand how boring you sound? If I wasn\’t aiming to focus on this match I believe I would slip into a coma listening to you drone on with your worthless viewpoints and your anodyne observations.Just stopped talking.
No? Effectively. I will. No, I am not saying anything. I am not even going to nod, shake my head or make an affirmative grunt. Absolutely nothing. An overall silence.My goodness
me, you have actually stopped. Perhaps you have remembered that you have to breathe? Ah, excellent you have actually noticed that I not seem listening. Believe me, I am listening and I am doing so with considerable attentiveness, since I require to listen to exactly what is coming my way. Let me think, I think you will lead with \”are you paying attention to me?\” any second now and yes, there it is as predicted. I am not going to respond to. Go on, repeat the concern and real to form you do so. Now I have your attention have not I? I can see you from the corner of my eye as I look at the screen pretending that the figures running around with the ball are more intriguing than you. They are not due to the fact that what you are beginning to do is exactly what I have an interest in. I can see you leaning forward, attempting to catch my eye. I know you are there however I am not going to acknowledge you. Often you toss something towards me to get my attention, generally a cushion. It is not a nasty action, not like when I toss things at you. That advises me, I need to replace that coffee mug which I tossed at you. You were light on your toes that day as it sailed previous and smashed versus the wall. Anyway, that was recently and this is now and I can hear you asking the question a 3rd time. Will it be the cushion? No, you have actually decided to stand instead. Gosh, you should be wanting to assert some authority from the start.
\”I am speaking with you.\”
I understand that you are but I am not answering you but currently I can hear the mounting inflammation in your voice and already I can feel the flames increasing within me as they burn away the cold, harsh iciness of your criticism. That pain is already receding.
\”Will you answer me please?\”
No I will not. I need to turn my head so you do not see my laugh at your effort to be commanding. It entertains me. I can see your hands transfer to your hips and I half expect you to stamp the ground with your foot.
\”What\’s the matter? Why will not you address me?\”
The voice increases greater, signalling your anxiety and frustration and the flames continue to develop within me. I keep the stony dealt with expression, ink shiners looking at the screen. I can see the movement on the television however it as if I am seeing it from really far as all that I am concentrating on now is your voice and the continuing delicious flaming sensation that is sweeping throughout me.
\”Why are you not answering me?\”
The concerns have changed now have not they? A switch from your nosiness about my work to you now asking why I have fallen quiet. You can keep asking and I understand you will. You will go on for a long time. You will storm out of the space trying to require a reaction from me, however your knocked door just keeps the flames burning. You will come back in. you always do. You will return contrite and apologising although you will not know exactly what you are aiming to apologise for. Still, that will not stop you going through a carousel of reasons in the hope of breaking my silence.
\”Did I distress you?\”
\”Did I state something wrong?\”
\”Did I not listen to you?\”
\”Did I state something offensive?\”
\”Please, exactly what did I do incorrect?\”
\”Please will you simply speak to me?\”
\”I dislike this. I hate falling out. Exactly what is that I have done?\”
Whenever you ask these concerns, the pain and concern in your voice keeps contributing to the sense of power that I am feeling. The injury you produced has actually long given that closed and now I am savouring the growing power that courses through me. You have no idea exactly what you are doing as you attempt, as you constantly do, to make things. I will stay seated here, not even looking at you. You will not try and stand in front of me whilst I am watching the tv. You will not dare do that or change it off. You remember exactly what occurred last time when you did that don\’t you and I know you won\’t remain in a rush to experience that again. I can sit and delight in my power over you and you just keep contributing to it with your pitiful and plaintive concerns. You will attempt to discover out exactly what is incorrect, you will blame yourself next and begin to apologise as you scramble to think what it is that you have actually done wrong in the hope that you discover the ideal subject matter and make things rights. You will stop working. You move on to attempting to bribe me into speaking to you, suggesting we go out, or my friends come round for drinks tomorrow night or that you will prepare me something unique. Keep at it, I won\’t respond. I will not even look at you. You are entirely undetectable to me as far as you are concerned.I wonder how long I will keep this silence with you? You have not worked out exactly what to do yet, I am delighted to state. You keep on asking, pestering and questioning, driven by your own stress and anxiety that triggers you to want to determine exactly what has taken place and make things. This implies you may break off for half an hour however then you resume, attempting a various tack. If all you understood you had to so was do precisely what I am doing and it would stop. Go quiet and proceed with exactly what you desire to do and I will start speaking to you and acknowledging you when again as I think about a various manipulation to use versus you to collect my valuable fuel. Thankfully, your empathic nature which indicates you wish to comprehend and you wish to fix and heal, will make you hang in there and all the while you offer me with fuel and power me. So long as you do so, so long the silence will continue.